Im happy but there is a heavy feeling of sadness in my heart that I just can't remove. Why am I like this?

In the absence of a should, I was free to be as I am.

It’s here now, writing to you.

You are like me, then.

If you’re an atheist, what would be your motive in spreading atheism, and why would you care what others believe?

What I am trying to say is that when you stop trying to change yourself into something you are not, you give yourself the gift of discovering yourself as you already are.

So I finally threw my hands up and said something to the tune of “fuck it, since I can't seem to change, I’ll just be whatever I am then.”

Now, this may sound like a story of failure and giving up, but it’s actually a story of liberation.

What is the naughtiest fantasy that you've lived out?

Most people that know me would probably describe me as a social, happy, and somewhat quirky person with a twisted sense of humor.

I had run out of hope.

Be who you already are.

Why do many modern Hollywood films rely heavily on CGI and visual effects instead of actual sets? What is your opinion on this trend?

It wasn’t until about 10 years ago that I finally fell out of that ferris wheel of trying and failing to fix myself.

It’s still here.

This interpretation lead me on a path of self improvement, to fix what I considered to be “wrong” with myself.

What shouldn't you Google?

Needless to say, my failed attempts to fix my sadness simply brought me more pain and suffering.

And the sadness?

But unlike before, there is no more resistance to the sadness.

How should one respond to compliments such as "You are so special" and "I'm lucky to have met you" from a guy?

For much of my adult life, I interpreted this sadness as something being wrong - with either myself or my life in general.

What most people don’t know unless they’ve looked more closely is that there is also an element of deep, profound sadness that has always been with me since as long as I can remember.

You are the masterpiece you came here to discover.

Katie Thurston admits Ananda Lewis’ death left her ‘spiraling’ as she battles Stage 4 breast cancer - New York Post

When I stopped trying to force myself to be something I am not, I gave myself the freedom of being who I am.

I was tired of fighting.

It’s impossible to overstate the freedom and peace I discovered, and I realized the only one who had been keeping those from me was… me and my imagined standards and expectations for how I had imagined I should be.

What's an uncomfortable truth you've learned to accept?

The sadness was still there.

So if you are sad - like me - then be sad.

Your job is not to be the manager of your life, but the one who discovers yourself fully.

Why do entitled people demand that I pick up after my doggo when he goes to the bathroom? Do they not know that doggy doo decomposes & feeds the plants?

Without resistance, sadness has a sense of beauty and depth I cannot find otherwise in life.

I was tired of trying and failing.

But no matter what I read or practiced, I could never make the sadness budge for longer than a few fleeting moments - and even then, it was likely due to me being distracted from the sensation of sadness rather than anything actually shifting.

What do you think of the 2 female 18 and 19 year-old German tourists, detained in Honolulu, strip-searched, put in green jumpsuits, placed in a holding cell and the next day deported, for the terrible crime of not pre-booking a hotel for their trip?

It’s difficult to put into words exactly what caused what, but to the best of my ability to describe it, I felt as if my will to keep fighting was beaten right out of me.

It’s the most beautiful and liberating thing in the world.